You’ve heard of coffee, yes? That miraculous elixir that removes the dead-eyed glaze from your face after a long, hard night of partying or, conversely, trying to sleep while your neighbors are partying? It is, indeed, my morning beverage of choice.
So, have you heard of Slashdot?
Slashdot is “News for nerds, stuff that matters.” The headlines go like, “LexisNexis and Other Major Data Brokers Hacked By ID Theft Service” and “Interview: Contiki OS Creator On Building the Internet of Things” and “Ask Slashdot: Are We Witnessing the Decline of Ubuntu?” You get the picture.
Welllll . . . there’s this mysterious breed of sentient being that doesn’t drink coffee. (I know, *GASP!* right? I’m actually married to one of those people. Shocker! Yes, it’s been rough, but I think we’ll make it.) At the same time, this strange breed of being does tend to read, um . . . a certain type of nerdy internet tech forum.
Well, I had a revelation this morning. Every single day of our married life, while I rush around making my brew at the speed of light, or at the speed of a harried, sleep-deprived mom-of-seven, anyway, SuperDad calmly sits in front of his dual-monitor PC set up while putting on his socks, and reads Slashdot.
DING!! The light-bulb flashed on above my head.
Slashdot is his coffee.
This is me right now:
Why did it take me so long — thirteen years, in fact — to realize what’s going on? I am shaken down to the depths of my caffeinated soul. My life will never be the same. Any advice on how to assimilate this astounding revelation into my consciousness without causing a rift in my personal space-time continuum would be appreciated. Quick, before my brain shorts out.
And now, back to the secret lab!